Confirmed: Wayne Rooney Retires From Football To Continue Working In Garden Centre

English footballing ace and confident drink driver, Wayne Mark Rooney, today has confirmed that he will no longer be lacing up the boots, but instead be selling geraniums at the garden centre he has been working in as part of his community service sentence.

The shock move came just months after the freckled scousers drink driving conviction in September where he was ordered to complete 100 hours of unpaid work.

“Honestly, I was really enjoying it, the plants and stuff really chilled me out and I found myself proper relaxed by it all, love having a name badge on my uniform as well.”

Currently earning £150,000 a week, the former Manchester United star has said he will be using some of his lucrative wages to open up a chain of garden centres in the next few years.

“Yeah, it’ll be great, call it Wayne’s Gardens and have a Rooney’s plant care range, really pleased with myself!”

Coming soon to a retail park near you.

 

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