Newly Turned Liberal Student Ruins Rest Of Republican Families Thanksgiving

Universities are places of isolated debate, sexually transmitted diseases, bias curriculums and cult like fraternities, as sophomore, Ryan Clint Drewmoore discovered in his first semester at Columbia University in New York State.

“Well, basically it all begin with a girl, who is originally from New England, a traditional Democrat hotbed, and I come from South Texas, where people don’t know anything other than Republican…and guns”

Having recently been converted to the liberal saviour, Bernie Sanders, by his new flame, he knew returning home would be climatic but he didn’t expect to see a side dish of wet carrots go flying past his aging aunts face as she tried to dissolve herself from the dining room table argument.

“All I said was maybe homosexual people aren’t ill and that’s the way they feel instead of choosing to be that way” Revealed the exasperated yet hopeful student.

“You know I thought they would respect me enough to just listen to what I was saying, they don’t have to agree with it, god it’s like people in the real world don’t understand debate”

Ryan admitted his father had even brought a side arm to the table, wearing a MAGA baseball cap who referred to his son as a snowflake an estimated 36 times during the course of the Thanksgiving meal.

The first year student now says all this holiday has given him is guilt and shame.



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